Britney Spears' 'Everyday' gets leaked (Lyrics and Audio)

Britney Spears' unreleased single called "Everyday" has made its way online. It is uncertain yet when the song was recorded but some reports say it's a leftover of the "Femme Fatale" album.

Britney Spears - "Everyday"

According to some, the ballad is a rip-off of Christina Aguilera's 2002 hit "Beautiful" especially the piano chords which might be one of the reasons why it was not released yet. Nevertheless, fans will surely find "Everyday" refreshing. Check out the song's audio stream and its lyrics below:

Britney Spears - "Everyday" Lyrics

Footsteps in the rain, memories wash away.

Beyond the headlight glare, it's kind of dark out there.

And everywhere I've been, It's hard to find a friend.

I've got no alibis for the state I'm in.

Everybody needs, needs a place to go.

God knows I have seen; it's a twisting, winding road.

Everyday, the sun comes up again.

A little hope begins, and it starts with you 'cause you get me through it.

And everyday, [I'm] closer to the shore, I smile a little more

And because of your faith, I get closer now everyday.

(Said everyday, I said everyday, everyday)

It's hard to recognize, across the great divide

Just once you left behind, and what you keep inside

A ripple in the , keep my safe from harm noypistuff

Somehow you still believe; you believe in me.

Where it starts and it ends, only time must know

Wherever you will be, is where I wanna go.

Everyday, the sun comes up again.

A little hope begins, and it starts with you 'cause you get me through it.

And everyday, [I'm] closer to the shore, I smile a little more

And because of your faith, I get closer now everyday.

'Cause you set me free

'Cause you set me free

And, Everyday, the sun comes up again.

A little hope begins, and it starts with you 'cause you get me through it.

And everyday, [I'm] closer to the shore, I smile a little more

And because of your faith, I get closer, now, everyday

Beyonce's 'Countdown' music video has arrived

Beyonce has released the music video for her single "Countdown." 

Beyonce showing off her baby bump on "Countdown" video

Check out below the colorful "Countdown" music video which was directed by Adria Petty, the director of Beyonce's "Sweet Dreams" MV in 2009.

Taken from her fourth studio album "4," Beyonce referred "Countdown" as "really experimental."

"I wanted to do something refreshing and different, so I mixed genres and drew inspiration from touring, traveling, watching rock bands, and attending festivals… I was like a mad scientist, putting lots of different songs together. Boyz II Men were the first ones to put Destiny's Child on tour. They showed us how to treat an opening act and I will never forget that. That was 15 years ago! Wow, 15 years! I'm old." Beyonce had told Digital Spy.

Here are some stills from Beyonce's "Countdown" music video:

Video and stills courtesy of MTV and Sony

Esquire Ball flocked by celebrities (Photos)

A number of local celebrities in their fabulous gowns and outfits were spotted at the Esquire Ball 2011 which was successfully held last night, October 5, 2011. Check out some photos of your favorite stars during the Esquire Ball below:

Anne Curtis, Angel Locsin and Phil Younghusband


Lovi Poe, Miriam Quiambao, Ruffa Guttierez, and Bea Alonzo


Elmo Magalona and Andi Eigenmann


Bubbles Paraiso and Phoemela Barranda


Divine Lee and Maxene Magalona

Bea Alonzo and Zanjoe Marudo

Fabio Ide, Akihiro Sato, and Victor Basa

Last night's event was the launch party of the newest magazine in the country, Esquire Magazine which released its premier issue this month. Congressman and boxing champ Manny Pacquiao is on its cover.

Esquire Ball 2011 photos courtesy of Rajo Laurel, Bubble Paraiso Jonas Antonio Gaffud, Nyko Rodriguez, Maxene Magalona, and to other respectful owners

Scarlett Johansson on leaked photos: 'It feels unjust'

Scarlett Johansson for Vogue in 2009

Scarlett Johansson has broken her silence about her leaked photos that went viral on the web recently and became an inspiration of a daring internet craze.

In her recent interview with CNN, "The Horse Whisperer" star defended her privacy and said she find the leakage unjust and wrong.

"Who doesn't want to protect their own privacy? Just because you're in the spotlight, or just because you're an actor or make films or whatever doesn't mean you're not entitled to your own personal privacy," Johansson told CNN.

"If that is sieged in some way, it feels unjust. It feels wrong."

Prior to the CNN interview, the 26-year-old actress had also been asked about how she deals with the controversy.

"It's an adjustment, but there are certain instances where you give a lot of yourself and then finally you just have to kind of put your foot down and say, ‘No, wait, I'm taking it back,’" she said.

Scarlet Johansson's leaked photos made their way online last month and showed her in a state of undress in a home setting. One of the two photos shows her unclothed rear view clearly visible in a mirror, while the other photo exposes her breast while lying with no clothes on a bed.

She had asked the help of the Federal Bureau of Investigation, claiming her phones and computers were hacked.

Andrea Corr postpones Philippine concerts

Andrea Corr is postponing her "Lifelines Tour" concerts in the Philippines which were earlier scheduled on October 16 in Manila and October 18 in Cebu. 

Andrea Corr's Lifelines Concert Tour 2011 in Manila and Cebu Postponed

According to reports, the lead singer of popular Irish band The Corrs is suffering from a severe infection in her ear and has been advised not to travel by her physicians.

Andrea Corr's concert in Manila will be reset to a later date. There are no official announcements yet regarding the new schedule.

Aside from Manila and Cebu concerts, the singer is also rescheduling her performances in Osaka and Tokyo in Japan, Singapore, Melbourne, Sydney, New Zealand, Jakarta, and Kuala Lumpur.

While her siblings were on hiatus to raise their families, Andrea Corr released her first solo album, "Ten Fifth High", in 2007. Her second album "Lifelines" came out this year. These upcoming concerts of hers in the country are part of her "Lifelines" album tour.

Beyonce's 'Countdown' music video preview debuts

The music video of one of Beyonce's new singles, "Countdown," will not be available for online viewing until October 6th, the reported date of its official release. But just moments ago, MTV revealed a 30-second preview of the latest Beyonce MV.

Check out below the said "Countdown" music video which was directed by Adria Petty, the director of Beyonce's "Sweet Dreams" MV in 2009.

Beyonce's 'Countdown' music video preview courtesy of MTV

Taken from her fourth studio album "4," Beyonce referred "Countdown" as "really experimental."

"I wanted to do something refreshing and different, so I mixed genres and drew inspiration from touring, traveling, watching rock bands, and attending festivals… I was like a mad scientist, putting lots of different songs together. Boyz II Men were the first ones to put Destiny's Child on tour. They showed us how to treat an opening act and I will never forget that. That was 15 years ago! Wow, 15 years! I'm old." Beyonce had told Digital Spy.

Here are some stills of the music video:

Which look is your favorite?

Alyssa Milano, 5-week old son Milo grace US Weekly

Alyssa Milano and Baby Milo | Photo: US Weekly

A photo of Alyssa Milano with her first son with David Bulgari named Milo Thomas is on the latest issue of the US Weekly Magazine. Milo Thomas is now about 5 weeks old.

In this issue, Alyssa shares about her husband and their little angel.

"Everything is going so well," Alyssa told US Weekly. "David told me, 'It's like you were dropped off from Planet Mom!' I said, 'No, he's such a great baby, he's just making me look good!'"

Alyssa and David tied the knot on August 15, 2009 in New Jersey and Milo is their first baby. Milo was born on August 31st this year.

It is going to be a busy few months for the 38-year-old "Charmed" actress after giving birth since she is part of the cast of the upcoming films "New Year's Eve" and "Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chip-Wrecked," which are both to be released this year.

'No Other Woman' gross now P100M after 5 days

No Other Woman poster

"No Other Woman's" total gross is now estimated to have reached the Php100 Million mark since it opened in theaters 5 days ago, according to reports.

Anne Curtis who just got back from Bangkok, Thailand also tweeted about her movie's box office performance just a while ago.

"I'm back! Hello Manila! what awesome news to come back to! 100M na in 5 days ang No Other Woman. Thank you so much guys! Overwhelming!!" Anne said.

She added, "I'm actually super speechless, so I'll keep it simple and sincerely say thank you to all of you!!!"

It was earlier reported that "No Other Woman" raked in P15 Million during its first day in Philippine cinemas.

Topbilled by Anne Curtis, Derek Ramsay, and Cristine Reyes, "No Other Woman" is directed by Ruel S. Bayani and was rated “A” by the Cinema Evaluation Board and "R-13" by the MTRCB.

It tells the story of a married furniture supplier (Derek Ramsay) who was tempted to stray by a comely young client (Anne Curtis). His wife (Cristine Reyes), keen to the client's romantic ambitions, is soon fighting for the love of her own husband.

Watch the trailer of "No Other Woman" here: http://noypistuff.blogspot.com/2011/09/no-other-woman-movie-trailer-starring.html

Julia Montes, Kathryn Bernardo, Sam Pinto, etc. go high fashion on Preview Magazine's October 2011 covers

Today's brightest young stars Julia Montes, Kathryn Bernardo, Sam Pinto, Danita Paner, Jasmine Curtis-Smith, Kylie Padilla, and Lauren Young are all featured on the covers of the October 2011 issue of Preview magazine.

Wearing Louis Vuitton outfits, the girls look fabulous and sophisticated on the covers - their first collective shoot. Check out this month's covers of Preview Magazine below:

Julia Montes, Kathryn Bernardo and Sam Pinto - Preview Magazine October 2011 Cover

Danita Paner, Jasmine Curtis-Smith, Kylie Padilla, and Lauren Young for Preview Magazine

 Apart from the special features of the cover girls which will make readers know them better, also inside this issue are the following: 26 hottest names on the culture scene today, newest about denims, editor's dresses at the A/W collection and a lot more.

Preview Magazine's October 2011 issue is now available in your favorite stands and stores.

Piolo Pascual, KC Concepcion to kick off US concert tour this month

Real-life couple Piolo Pascual and KC Concepcion will be flying together to the US for a series of concerts later this month. The said "Piolo and KC Live in Concert US Tour" will also feature "Pinoy Dream Academy" grand winner Yeng Constatino.

"Piolo Pascual and KC Concepcion with Yeng Constatino Live in Concert US Tour" Poster

Check out the concert schedule and venues below:

October 28 – New York, NY – Tribeca Performing Arts – Call 914.346.9646 for tickets
October 29 – Chicago, IL – Pickwick Theater – Call 224.392.5130 for tickets
November 4 – Los Angeles, CA – Shrine Auditorium – Call 562.219.7235
November 6 – San Francisco, CA – James Logan HS – Call 510.552.1546 for tickets

"Piolo & KC with Yeng Live in Concert US Tour" is being presented by Berce Enterprises.

Maria Aragon debuts 'Born This Way' music video

Youtube singing sensation Maria Aragon, who rose to fame after doing an impressive cover of Lady Gaga's hit single "Born This Way," has released her own music video of the said song.

A screen capture of Maria Aragon's "Born This Way" music video

The 11 year-old Filipina who grew up in Manitoba, Canada flew to Philippines in July, 2011 to ink a recording deal with Star Records, a few months after her Gaga cover went viral online.

"Born This Way" is part of Maria Aragon's 7-track debut album which also includes the following:

"Can't Smile Without You"
"Follow Your Dream"
"I'd Like To Teach The World To Sing"
"Kung Bubuksan Mo Lang Ang Puso"
"One Hope One Dream"
"You're My Home"

Check out the music video of Maria Aragon's "Born This Way" below:


Earlier this year, Maria Aragon appeared on US TV show "Ellen," performed with Lady Gaga during The Monster Ball Tour and sang before the Canadian Prime Minister after gaining worldwide recognition for her successful Youtube stint.

Kathryn Bernardo, Daniel Padilla show chemistry on 'Growing Up' (Photos)

Kathryn Bernardo and Daniel Padilla prove to be one of the most effective on-screen partners right now since fans can't stop raving about their chemistry on their show, "Growing Up." The new love team's fan base is also constantly growing.

Kathry Bernardo and Daniel Padilla

In "Growing Up," Kathryn Bernardo plays the role of boyish Ella who is constantly being annoyed by bad boy hearthtrob Patrick (Daniel Padilla). As the way I see things, Ella and Patrick will soon find out they have special feelings for each other.

"Growing Up" premiered on September 4, 2011 on ABS-CBN and is being aired every Sunday after "ASAP Rocks".

Check out below more pictures of Daniel Padilla and Kathryn Bernardo, who were given the monicker "Kathniel" by their fans:

 Above photos of Kathryn Bernardo and Daniel Padilla courtesy of their respective owners.

Angel Locsin, John Lloyd Cruz cover Cosmopolitan Magazine's October 2011 issue

On-screen love team Angel Locsin and John Lloyd Cruz are gracing the covers of the October 2011 issue of Cosmopolitan Magazine.

Angel Locsin, John Lloyd Cruz for Cosmopolitan Magazine (October 2011 issue)

According to Angel Locsin, it is her first fashion shoot after a year.

This double-cover issue will be available in your favorite stands and stores in the coming days.

Meanwhile, Angel Locsin and John Lloyd Cruz, who topbilled the hit ABS-CBN series "Imortal," will be reuniting in an upcoming Star Cinema movie which according to unverified reports will be released in November 2011. The film has no official title yet and is currently in the works. It is being directed by Cathy Garcia-Molina.
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Anne Curtis looks smoking hot on Rogue Magazine's October 2011 cover

Anne Curtis spices up the October 2011 issue of Rogue Magazine by gracing super hot and sexy on its cover and pages. Check out Anne Curtis' cover photo below:

Anne Curtis' Rogue Magazine October 2011 Cover

As you can see on the cover's layout, Anne is seen holding a cigarette. Will it spark a new controversy as well just like Nora Aunor's Yes! Magazine cover? Hmmmm...

Apparently shot in Paris, France while the actress was there with her boyfriend Erwan Heussaff for a vacation recently, the cover was photographed by Mark Nicdao. Check out below the behind-the-scenes of the shoot (Warning: VERY HOT):

Behind-the-Scenes of Anne Curtis' Rogue Shoot

Anne Curtis' movie "No Other Woman" is now being shown in several theaters nationwide starting today. The film also stars Derek Ramsay and Cristine Reyes. According to recent reports, cinema tickets are selling like pancakes.

Anne has also released recently her first studio album entitled "Annebisyosa."

Adele's 'Someone Like You' music video teaser released

Adele has just released a teaser clip of her music video for her hit song "Someone Like You" via MTV. Check it out below:

Adele "Someone Like You" Music Video Teaser | Courtesy of MTV

Shot in Paris and directed by Jake Nava, Adele's "Someone Like You" music video will be released on Thursday, at 7:56 p.m. ET/PT on MTV (Friday, around 8 am, Manila Time).

Adele (born Adele Laurie Blue Adkins) is a Grammy-winning British singer-songwriter who popularized the chart-topping song "Rolling in the Deep." She is currently in the middle of her "Adele Live" concert tour which kicked off last March 2011 and scheduled in various cities in North America and Europe in the coming months.

Liz Taylor jewelry collection to be auctioned in December

Liz Taylor jewelry to be auctioned | Photo: Christie's

More than 200 Elizabeth "Liz" Taylor jewelry pieces will be auctioned in December.

According to Christie's auction house, the December event will showcase "the greatest private collection of jewellery ever assembled in one place."

Among the Liz Taylor jewelry to be sold will be a ruby and diamond necklace designed by the late Hollywood actress herself with a 16th-century pearl that once belonged to Spanish royalty. It is expected to go for $2-3 million.

The Liz Taylor jewelry auction will be held on December 13-14, 2011 in New York and will bring together 269 necklaces, diamond rings, brooches and earrings valued at more than $30 million.

Elizabeth Taylor was an Oscar-winning actress who died on March 23 at the age of 79. She won two Academy Awards for best actress, including her remarkable performance in "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?" in 1966.

Check out the highlights of the Liz Taylor auction below courtesy of Christie's:

Anthony Linsangan, Camille Prats' husband, succumbs to cancer

Anthony Linsangan, Camille Prats, and their child in 2008

Anthony Linsangan, the husband of actress Camille Prats, passed away Friday morning at age 32, GMA News reported.

Linsangan had been battling nasopharyngeal cancer for a year now.

According to Camille Prats' manager, Lisangan died at 8:45 a.m. at the Makati Medical Center. Camille was reportedly at her husband's side when he took his last breath.

Linsangan's wake will be held at Heritage Park, Fort Bonifacio. The interment date has been scheduled on September 27th at the Manila Memorial Park in Cavite.

Camille and Anthony tied the knot in church on March 5, 2010, two years after their civil wedding in the US. The couple have a son named Nathaniel Caesar who is now 3 years old.

Nasopharyngeal cancer is a type of cancer that affects the upper throat.  According to studies, the disease affects more men than women.

Photo courtesy of Philstar

'The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo,' 'Justice,' and 'Man on a Ledge' | Movie Trailers Roundups

"The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo," the movie adaptation of Stieg Larrson's best-selling novel and two thriller films, "Justice" and "Man on a Ledge," premiered their official teaser trailers the past 24 hours. Check them out below:


"The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" - Journalist Mikael Blomkvist (Craig) is aided in his search for a woman who has been missing for forty years by Lisbeth Salander (Mara), a young computer hacker.
Cast: Daniel Craig, Rooney Mara and Stellan Skarsgård
Director/Writers: David Fincher / Steven Zaillian (screenplay), Stieg Larsson (novel)
Release Date: December 21, 2011 (US)


"Justice" aka "Seeking Justice"- Popular high school teacher Will Gerard (Cage) lives a life of content domesticity with his beautiful musician wife Laura (Jones). Until one night's horrific events, turns their world upside down.
Cast: January Jones, Nicolas Cage and Guy Pearce
Director/Writers: Roger Donaldson / Todd Hickey and Robert Tannen
Release Date: October 13, 2011 (HK)


"Man on a Ledge" - An ex-cop framed turned con threatens to jump to his death from a Manhattan hotel rooftop. The nearest New York Police officer immediately responds to a screaming women and calls dispatch. More Officers arrive with swat and tactical command along with FDNY. The NYPD then dispatches a female police psychologist personally requested to talk him down from the ledge. However, unbeknownst to the NYPD on the scene, the suicide attempt is a cover up for the biggest diamond heist ever pulled.
Cast: Elizabeth Banks, Sam Worthington and Jamie Bell
Director/Writers: Asger Leth / Pablo F. Fenjves, Chris Gorak, Erich Hoeber and Jon Hoeber
Release Date: January 13, 2011 (US)

Jennifer Lopez, Sara Bareilles and Timbaland | Music Videos Roundup

Jennifer Lopez, Sara Bareilles and Timbaland are among the recording artists who debuted the music videos of their newest singles this week. Check them out below:

Jennifer Lopez - "Papi"


Earlier this month Jennifer Lopez told Ryan Seacrest that "Papi," a single in her "Love" album, was named after her ex, Marc Anthony.

Sara Bareilles - "Gonna Get Over You"


The funny musical-themed MV of "Gonna Get Over You" was directed by "Get Him to the Greek" actor Jonah Hill. The song, meanwhile, is a self-production which Sara worked on with the help from Sam Farrar. It is part of her third studio album "Kaleidoscope Heart" which was released last year.

Timbaland - "Pass At Me" (featuring Pitbull)

"Pass at Me" will be part of Timbaland's upcoming studio album which is said to be the third installment of his "Shock Value" album series.

Which one is your favorite?

Sen. Miriam Defensor-Santiago Pick-up Lines, Quotes and Jokes

Senator Miriam Defensor-Santiago somehow became a stand-up comedienne when she delivered her speech filled with a lot of funny pick-up lines and jokes during the RH Bill Forum held in UP recently.  Check out a video of Sen. Santiago's speech courtesy of GMA-7 as well as the transcript of her jokes below:

Sen. Miriam Defensor-Santiago Pick-up lines, Quotes and Jokes | Courtesy of GMA-7

Courtesy of Chad Osorio, here are Sen. Miriam Santiago's pick-up lines and jokes:

[…] because I got a message from my friends from Twitter and Facebook. The message is:

“Para fair ang labanan sa susunod magpadala tayo ng interpreter sa Ms. Universe. Ipadala natin si Senator Miriam Defensor-Santiago. Pwede na rin si Kuya Kim Atienza para may kaunting trivia.”

When I was a student here I was a very, very committed student, I was very, very busy not only trying to stay in the honor roll, but also in many various extra-curricular activities. For example, I was editor of the Philippine Collegian, and at the same time I was [co-sponsor] of the UP ROTC not once but twice. This only shows that lightning can strike twice. I never had time to get picked up by any of the males, because at that time I was fully convinced that all males had the brains of an amoeba.

[…] someone very close to me and actually, you’ll be surprised, someone very shy. So I told her, you must meet the students of Metro Manila, and you’ll see how impressive they are. I want her to stand up so you can see her, Ms. Heart Evangelista. She’s a twice-awarded best actress in Philippine films, but she has no self-confidence, I discovered. If you want to teach her self-confidence, can you please first get in touch with me, so I can verify if your intentions are honorable. Actually she’s available at Facebook.

She told me yesterday when she got lost in Hong Kong and a man was following her from floor to floor in a department store. She got very frightened and had an almost traumatic experience, and burst into tears. That is the kind of feminine personality Heart has. So I told her, “No, why should you get frightened? You should have turned around and confronted your fears. You should’ve stood up very straight in front of that Chinaman, and you should have said, ‘See anything you like? Anything? It’s 50 dollars. For 50 dollars more your wife can watch.’” If you keep coming with me, Heart, you will get educated.

I was a very, very committed student. I always woke up at five o’clock and then went to church. And then I devoted myself to studying the entire day and the entire night, which was the opposite of what my dormmates used to do. They devoted themselves to, let us call it, extra-sexual activities. And when exam week came, they all went to St. Jude, the patron saint of the impossible.

I never got picked up by anybody, either here in the Philippines or abroad. But now I know there are certain pick-up lines which will prove irresistible.

Why don’t you try the following?

Kung magkakaroon ako ng sariling planeta, gusto ko ikaw ang axis nito, para sayo lang iikot ang mundo ko.

Sana FB status ka na lang, para pwede kitang i-like.

Ibenta mo na bahay mo, total nandidito ka na, nakatira sa puso ko.

Sana naka-off ang ilaw, para tayo na lang mag-on.

Noodles ka ba, kasi Lucky Me?

Parang see-saw, pag wala ka, down ako.

Para kang hold-upper, lahat ibibigay ko sayo, wag mo lang akong saktan.

Galing mo din, ano? Di mo pa ko binabato tinamaan mo na ako.

Maglaro tayo ng kahit ano, wag lang taguan, kasi a girl like you is hard to find.

Sana exam mo na lang ako, para sagutin mo rin ako.

Bastos ka rin, ano? Di ka man lang nagpapaalam tuloy-tuloy kang pumasok sa puso ko.

Google ka ba? Lahat kasi ng hinahanap ko sayo ko natagpuan.

Nakalimutan ko pangalan mo, eh. Pwede bang tawagin na lang kitang… akin?

Nakalunok ka ba ng kwitis, kasi pag ngumiti ka, may spark

This is what Dr. […] Cabral said to Dr. Esperanza Cabral, when they were both students in the UP College of Medicine.

Sana ikaw ang cardiologist ko, para ikaw ang mag-aalaga sa puso ko.

Sana scientist ako, para ikaw naman ang lab ko.

Tindera ka ba ng yosi? Kasi you give me Hope… and More.

Para kang cactus, kasi handa akong masaktan, mayakap ka lang.

Pag wala ka ang buhay ko parang lapis na hindi natasahan: pointless.

Let’s go to Q&A.

Q: Pano mo sasabihin sa isang babae na mataba siya na hindi siya mababastos?
A: Excuse me, Miss, Mang Tomas ba ang lotion mo?

GUY 1: May sagot ka ba sa exam?
GUY 2: Puro blanko.
GUY 1: Patay.
GUY 2: Bakit?
GUY 1: Baka isipin nila nagkopyahan tayo.

I never thought I was going to enter politics coz I was studying hard here in UP to prepare for my future. I always thought that I would someday be a rocket scientist, astrophysicist, or even a lion-tamer. I never wanted to enter politics. I was simply forced by the circumstances. I’m afraid I was seduced by the young people of this country.

Once I entered politics, it became natural, being a civil, God-fearing, law-abiding citizen, for me to lose my temper, because politicians are… [waves hand down].

So… kelangan minsan sa politika, para lang mabuhay sa pulitika, to survive, if not to prevail, kelangan mataray ka. Iba naman klaseng taray ito. Eto nga yun sinasabi ko.

Di ko sinasabing maganda ako. Sinasabi ko lang, pangit ka.

Pag nakikita kita, parang gusto kong magsorry sa mga mata ko.

Wife: Ibili mo ako ng bagong bra.
Husband: Wag ka ng mag-bra, maliit naman boobs mo.
Wife: Eh bakit ikaw, nagbebrief ka pa?

Heart Evangelista is so beautiful people often tell her how beautiful she is. And she always says she feels extremely mortified when she hears it. So I told her, “Don’t do that! Why should you be so shy and why should you be embarrassed?” And I told her, “When someone told me, ‘Ang ganda mo’ I answered ‘Sana ikaw rin.’”

In a swimming pool:

Classmate 1: I’m sure lulutang ka.
Classmate 2: Bakit? Dahil payat ako?
Classmate 1: Hindi, dahil plastic ka.

When the cashier at the grocery said, “Miss, pwedeng candy na lang ang sukli ko sa iyo?” I answered “Bakit, tsokolate ba ang ibinayad ko?”


The husband said, “When I’m gone you’ll never find another man like me.” The wife replied, “What makes you think I’d want another man like you?”

This is what I learned in my eight years in UP. I never learned this when I went to Harvard, Cambridge or Oxford, they were just dull. I will now go to my assigned topic. [Licks lips]